After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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