I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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