My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Randomize
