i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize
