I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
