Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
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