Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
