im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
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