hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Pants are for mortals
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