we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Randomize
