I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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