She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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