i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
