The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Its about making memories worth repressing
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
There's always time for handjobs
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
i think i just lost a toe
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
