The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
He better not be in your backpack
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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