those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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