your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
