Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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