you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
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