You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
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weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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