Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
