Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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