Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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