I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Randomize
