hotel room ftw
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
