he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
4 words: hood of his car
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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