there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
