is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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