Taylor Swift is so right about you.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
