my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
