were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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