I'm going to jail i love you
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
