meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
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