Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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