i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
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