Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I believe in your delicious
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
