is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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