a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I'm both gender and math confused
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
