just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
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