I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Acid is not a monday night drug
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
