Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
how does that bad decision feel?
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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