Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
