and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize