butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
