bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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