I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Randomize
