I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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