D3 body, D1 cock
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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