and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Randomize
