I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
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